Tag Archives: future

People like to tell me what to do with my life.

Since I discovered that I’m graduating way too soon and now that I’ve been working at a company full of 40-somethings with children, I’ve received a lot of advice.

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It seems like everyone has something to say to a young whippersnapper like me. A bunch of the PhD’s at my workplace have, at some point, sat me down and given me the story of their life. Which is fine. I could use some guidance right now.

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The problem is that I’ve received a lot of conflicting advice. My younger peers tend to think differently from the old dude chemists at work.

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I thought for a moment that maybe it was a generation thing. The older generation has a different perspective on life, yeah? But then my old advice-givers started sounding like my younger ones…

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…and vice versa…

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At the very least, they all agree on one thing.

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Unless it’s my family. In that case, it becomes

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Ok, well, my family doesn’t think much like anyone at all.

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Ah, Asian families. At any rate, I know that just a bachelor’s in biology won’t get me anywhere. Thus I have the Princeton GRE study guide at the moment. It’s sitting on my bed, reminding me of my impending graduation and the very real possibility of failure.

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All this advice has really put me in a muddle. Every person has the best of intentions. Every person thinks they have it all figured out. Every day brings me a step closer to becoming a lost college grad. (Which, at this point, I’m pretty convinced is what I’ll become.) My co-op has mostly taught me that the 9-5 cubicle life is not ideal, so I’m back right where I started.

In the end, the only person who can decide what to do with my life is me. Because I’m the one living it. At the end of it all, I’m the one who has to decide.

So I have to take a good, long look at my options. I need a little introspection. I need to… follow my heart.

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Next year is gonna be good.

A mid-life crisis at age 18

Oh crap. I did it again.

So I was in a “service-learning” class. Where I go and teach biology to middle schoolers. Not only that, but we were required to blog about our experiences in a private, school-run blog.

Our final blog had to be “reflective.” Talk about what we learned overall. And of course, what do I do? I draw another comic. This is such a terrible habit.

I started it out like this: (click for full size)

(She did. She suggested we draw a stick figure of “me from August” and “me right now.” So I complied! And thus I drew this:)

So, yes. I am in the middle of a mid-life crisis. In other words,

I think I knew this from the very beginning, but I’m not the type of person who could be a doctor. Becoming a doctor is a huge commitment. You have people’s well-beings in your hands. To be a doctor, you must be kind. Confident. Compassionate. Patient. Empathetic.

I’m just… well, I’m just not any of those things.

Being a doctor is an amazing and admirable thing, but I don’t think I could handle it. I don’t have the people skills. I’m incredibly impatient. I lack the kindness. And, when I think about becoming a doctor, it never really appeals to me.

I mean, my only real motive for pursuing pre-med would be

And of course, this is not the best reason to become, well, anything.

So I’ve got to be frank with myself. I’m not cut out to be a doctor. I’m just not that person. It’s a job that I feel like I, well, wouldn’t enjoy at all. But of course, since I no longer have pre-med as my path, I am now thrown into

It’d be so much easier if I just had a solid, clear-cut goal to work towards. I might not be a wonderful person who wants to HELP EVERYONE!… but I definitely am a workaholic. I just need to find something that I’m both passionate about and can make money with. It’s the combination of the two that’s the real problem.

(By the way, I’m not changing my major or anything. Bio is pretty interesting. And truly, this isn’t a groundbreaking change. Since biology majors cover all the pre-medical required classes, I could always decide I’m pre-med at any time. But I’m done fooling myself. That’s all.)